Here’s a question I’ve asked myself time and time again: Where can I go to meet women? Online dating sites don’t seem to work for me, I can’t function in bars, I don’t have any friends that know women, and I don’t naturally attract people in public. Sure I can try approaching potential dates and making small talk, but again, since I’m not that attractive, I won’t make a good first impression.
Ok, I’m not being too hard on myself, I’m just facing facts. I can’t pretend that I’m someone I’m not and that everything will work itself out. I have to come to terms with things and accept myself before I can move on. It’s no big deal. This is the hand I was dealt, and this is all I have to work with.
Ok, so obviously, the direct approach doesn’t work for me – I can live with that. But does it mean that I have to resign myself to a life of solitude? Surely, there must be a better way to get out there and get a foot in the door. I’ve just got to find something that I’m comfortable with. Once the pressure is off, I should be fine.
I can function ok once I get to know a person. In fact, I’m convinced that the only way I will ever meet anyone, and have them interested in me, is if we meet under non-romantic circumstances first. Beauty is skin deep, as they say.
The dating sites have taught me a few valuable lessons – even though they were mostly negative. They taught me that a guy like me has got to work a little harder, and be a little more creative, when trying to meet women.
I created several profiles on many dating sites - some with my picture, and others without. I got no responses at all from the sites that had my pic. I did get a few responses from the sites that did not have my picture in the profile, but in every instance, the women I was messaging back and forth stopped communicating after I sent a photo. Hard truth, but at least I’m not fooling myself.
So the problem is that I can’t break through the physical appearance barrier. I’m finished before I even start. I need another approach – something less direct.
There has got to be a way to meet someone without the whole dating/relationship thing hanging over our heads. I need to meet women in a totally non-romantic setting – a setting where the idea of dating and hooking up would be far down the list.
I know this goes against the advice of many of the great dating gurus, but I’ve always thought that their techniques relied heavily upon one’s appearance.
No, the only way I’m ever going to meet anyone is to meet them in a non-romantic way first. I’m certain of that.