Just be Yourself

As a single guy, and one who is relatively inexperienced in the dating world, one of the toughest challenges I've ever faced was to simply be myself. For some reason, once I was out in public around women, I assumed a different personality because I didn't like my own. This new "me" was always trying to be funny, clever, interesting, and likable. What I usually came off as was a desperate, needy guy who was trying to seek approval and attention from everyone.

To tell you the truth, I'm not sure exactly why I couldn't be myself around women. It's not like I had a horrible personality when I was just being me. Yes, I may not have been as talkative, clever, or funny, but I was sincere, down-to-earth and could carry a pretty good conversation.

It's only been within the last year or so that I've realized being yourself is not entirely bad. Heck, if they don't like me, then at least I won't be wasting anyone's time, including my own. Ultimately, if you establish any kind of relationship, your real personality is going to come out anyway - so why prolong it?

I think the problem many guys have is fear of failure. They would rather seek approval from everyone even if it means that they have to completely change their personality. Yes, you may attract more women by putting on this false front, but really, what's it going to buy you in the long run?

Once I started simply being myself, I noticed that I tended not to become stressed out as much. The conversations I did have seemed to be a little more relaxed and fluid. A big part of this new mindset was convincing myself that I didn't have to please everyone and, although I may have had to talk to more women, the ones I did connect with would be real.

So the next time you're talking to a beautiful woman and you're afraid that you're going to lose her if she discovers who you really are, simply remind yourself that there are more fish in the sea and it's not the end of the world. Sometimes dating is just a numbers game and you've got to go through a few rough patches before you find what you're looking for.